Bless her generous heart ... when Grimace gets an idea in her head she latches on to it like a bulldog with a steak bone. Granted, in this situation Jay and I were partly responsible for the muck-up, but the woman refused to try for a meal on a different weekend.
It went something like this:
Grimace: We haven't seen D&J for a while; I think I'm going to send them a note and ask them to meet us for dinner at the Spaghetti Factory on the 15th. Will that work for you and Jay?
Bendy: This is July ... and why are you sending them a note? Why don't you just call them? But ... yeah, I think the 15th will be fine.
Grimace: I'm unemployed now, remember? I need something to fill the hours - I can't gamble all the time.
And so the plan was hatched. Then Jay and I threw a wrench into the mix by winning a bid on baseball tickets for the 15th. Then the Missouri Department of Transportation tossed us a rotten egg - they were closing all west-bound traffic on Highway 64-40 for the entire weekend for emergency bridge inspections / repairs. While I appreciate their diligence, perhaps they shouldn't have re-striped a bridge designed to carry two lanes of traffic to one that can "carry" three lanes of traffic. They have no one to blame for this predicament but themselves - waaaay back during the great flood of 1993 they had their chance to re-build that rickety piece of bridge-work spanning the Missouri River and were too slow-witted to figure out that development was moving West. And so today, rather than spend money building a new three-lane bridge, we have three narrow lanes of traffic moving perilously west on a bridge that wasn't constructed to withstand it. We try to avoid using the Boone Bridge whenever possible ... in our minds it's an unnecessary risk like smoking or using an electric tea kettle while taking a bath.
Anyhoo, this all meant meant that in order to get home from the restaurant Grimmie wanted us all to meet at Jay and I would have to travel many, many, miles out of our way. Being selfish jerks we immediately placed a call to the parental unit and requested a change of venue, change of date, and even suggested pushing it back to another weekend.
Grimace was all for a change of venue and pushing dinner from Saturday to Sunday but that was it - we're meeting this weekend, and it will take more than a bridge closure to change that! So Jay and I suggested the Tap Room as a dining alternative. While it represented a long haul for us, it would be a fairly easy spot for the parents and D&J to reach ... and they have hearty pub-style food and wonderful beer. What could be better?
Turns out a lot could have been better, more's the pity.
The Tap Room consistently wins awards for favorite local pub and grub, but either their standards have gone way downhill or we caught them on a bad day. Our waitress was a little less than knowledgeable when we asked which beers were on tap and I caught her flat-footed a little while later when I wanted to know which cheeses were featured on their cheese plate. Turns out almost none of the specialty brews that Schlafly is fond of touting were available that afternoon and what we did choose was served in wonky glasses. We wanted pints and we might have even wanted more than one but nobody ever came back to ask us if our thirst had been quenched until it was obvious that we were getting ready to leave. As for the cheese plate ... all I can say is WHAT WERE THEY THINKING???
It's a pub. Their cheese plate should include cheddar, Stilton, maybe some brie, or perhaps some goat or sheep's milk cheese. Wanna get interesting? Throw some white Stilton on there and WOW the polish right off my toenails. But lavender-infused goat and lemon-thyme something-or-other just don't work for me in a pub, and those cheeses don't seem like they'd work too well with beer, either. If they'd offered a boursin I might have been more willing to take the plunge, but the last cheese was a plain old stinky Stilton and that was the final nail in the coffin ... no cheese plate for our table.
It's the bar!
I ordered a glass of Biere de Garde, which is one of Schlafly's bottle conditioned beers - this one is based on a French farmhouse-style ale; it has a slightly sweet maltiness and seems to pair well with a variety of foods in my humble opinion. Jay selected Schlafly's Oatmeal Stout, which is one of the brewery's "standard" beers - that means it's available year-round in bottles or on tap. I took a taste of Jay's beer since I've recently discovered that stouts are pretty damn tasty and this one was smooth with a nice blend of sweet and bitter. Jon ordered a beer, too; it's lurking in the background of the picture below, but farg if either Jay or I can remember what it was.
Biere de Garde and Oatmeal Stout
Well, when we get together at table there are usually a couple of appetizers being shared around and this meal was no different. After much discussion the group consensus was for Bavarian Style Pretzels served warm with White Cheddar Dipping Sauce, and Beer Bread - Pale Ale Bread served with Cheddar Butter and Bleu Cream Cheese.
Pretzels from Bavaria???
Beery Bread
The clear winner in this contest was the beer bread, hands down. I guess if Bavarian-style pretzels are hard, chewy, somewhat stale, and coated with salt then these were awesomely authentic. Having never been to Bavaria I cannot say if these were, in fact, true to the original. I will say that the white cheddar sauce was very very good, and did make up a little for the overall cussedness of the pretzel sticks. I'm still not convinced, however, that those pretzels weren't the same ones that are sold on Stinktown city streets in brown paper bags on the weekends ... if you're looking to break a tooth or give someone a concussion, then these are the food / weapon of choice. The beer bread, on the other hand, was wonderful - soft, warm, and yeasty it really hit the spot. And while it was equally good with the cheddar butter and the bleu cream cheese, my personal preference, oddly enough, was the bleu cream cheese. I know, I know ... Bendy doesn't like bleu cheese ... but this was mild and creamy, much more like a subtle boursin than a stinky, toe-jamb, cave-aged bleu cheese. At the end of the evening there was no bread left but there were still plenty of pretzels which tells you which of these two appetizers was truly the only one worth ordering.
When it came time to place our dinner order, I actually chose a salad because nothing else sounded remotely appealing. My selection was a Spinach Salad served with Grilled Chicken, Feta Cheese, and Bacon-Sherry Vinaigrette. While salad can be the intestinal kiss of death for this Old Crohn, for some reason spinach doesn't bother me like other greens. I don't order it often when we are dining out, but love to eat fresh spinach salad at home where the bathroom is just a few quick steps away should digestive disaster strike.
Spinach Salad Surprise
I was most displeased when this arrived at the table. For one thing it was covered in red onions, which were nowhere mentioned on the menu. I hate red onions like I hate mushrooms and olives ... none shall pass my lips. The other reason I was displeased is that every single spinach leaf glistened with vinaigrette. I blame myself for not asking that the dressing be served on the side - that was a stupid mistake on my part - but what gives with adding ingredients to the dish that aren't even listed on the menu??? It's a good thing for me that Grimmie likes onions so much ... she picked 'em out of my salad faster than you could say "pass the mouthwash."
Jay and Jon both ordered the same entree: Bangers and Mash with Red Onion Gravy and Fried Onions. If you ask me there seems to be a real onion-y theme going down at the Tap Room these days ... but the really strange thing about this dish was that the "fried" onions apparently means onion tings which was a surprise to all parties at our table. Hey Schlafly's ... how 'bout some Truth in Ordering???
Onion Rings with a side order of Mash
The good news is that both Jon and Jay enjoyed their dinner selections and that's really the most important thing, but I'm pretty sure that Jay likes the Bangers & Mash he's ordered down at WDW better than this version.
Dylan ordered Shepherd's Pie, only that's not really what it's called on the menu. I think he actually chose the Steak and Mushroom Pie - a British Meat Pie with a Green Onion Cheddar Biscuit. I believe that once he actually reached the meat / stew portion of his meal he liked it, but that topping was a catastrophe. If you ask me, and no one did, it looks like someone dumped half a box of Bisquick into a cement mixer and then spread it across this dish after it began to harden. The poor guy practically needed a jack-hammer to break on through to the other side.
The good news is that both Jon and Jay enjoyed their dinner selections and that's really the most important thing, but I'm pretty sure that Jay likes the Bangers & Mash he's ordered down at WDW better than this version.
Dylan ordered Shepherd's Pie, only that's not really what it's called on the menu. I think he actually chose the Steak and Mushroom Pie - a British Meat Pie with a Green Onion Cheddar Biscuit. I believe that once he actually reached the meat / stew portion of his meal he liked it, but that topping was a catastrophe. If you ask me, and no one did, it looks like someone dumped half a box of Bisquick into a cement mixer and then spread it across this dish after it began to harden. The poor guy practically needed a jack-hammer to break on through to the other side.
That biscuit looks like the Lost Continent of Atlantis
Grimmie ordered her usual stand-by: The One-Pound Reuben with Corned Beef, Griddled Rye, Kraut, Swiss Cheese, and Thousand Isle Dressing with Potato Salad on the side. She was happy and that's all there was to it. Jen ordered a Vegetable Pita which came with sprouts and cucumber sauce and nasty purple slaw - she seemed to like the pita but wasn't interested in the slaw. Don't blame her one bit - I wouldn't want it either!
I can't speak for anyone else but Jay and I really thought this whole meal was "meh." It didn't live up to our expectations at all and it will be a long time before we decide to try the Tap Room again. The next time we get a crave for pub food in Stinktown we'll go back to the Scottish Arms. And as an aside I apologize for putting this here rather than at the end but this effing programming is driving me bugshit and keeps arbitrarily changing font sizes and styles on me. So I'm quitting now before I throw the damned laptop out the front window.
The only thing better than a Philly Cheese Steak is a Reuben
Veggie Pita with Purple Slaw ... it tastes like purple!
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